Hi all,

This is not original, it arrived uncredited so I don't know if it's
old or not, or who wrote it.  I thought it was amusing...

JimO (ockers@ockers.net)

Forwarded message:

>    If Operating Systems Ran Airlines:

> UNIX Airways
> Everyone brings one piece of the plane along when they come to the airport. 
> They all go out on the runway and put the plane together piece by piece, 
> arguing non-stop about what kind of plane they are supposed to be
> building.

> Air DOS
> Everybody pushes the airplane until it glides, then they jump on and let 
> the plane coast until it hits the ground again. Then they push again, jump
> on again, and so on ...

> Mac Airlines
> All the stewards, captains, baggage handlers, and ticket agents look neat 
> and act exactly the same. Every time you ask questions about details, you 
> are gently but firmly told that you don't need to know, that you really 
> don't want to know, and that everything will be done for you without your 
> ever having to know, so just shut up. And the flights all wherever the 
> pilot damn well pleases, regardless of where you're trying to go.

> Windows Air
> The terminal is pretty and colorful, with friendly stewards, easy baggage 
> check and boarding, and a smooth take-off. After about 10 minutes in the 
> air, the plane explodes with no warning whatsoever.

> Windows NT Air
> Just like Windows Air, but costs more, uses much bigger planes, and takes 
> out all the other aircraft within a 40 mile radius when it explodes.

> Linux Air
> Disgruntled employees of all the other OS airlines decide to start their 
> own airline. They build the planes, ticket counters, and pave the runways 
> themselves. They charge a small fee to cover the cost of printing the 
> ticket, but you can also download and print the ticket yourself. When you 
> board the plane, you are given a seat, four bolts, a wrench and a copy of 
> the seat-HOWTO.html. You take the seat to a location of your choice and 
> bolt it into the deck, per the instructions. Once settled, the fully 
> adjustable seat is very comfortable, the plane leaves and arrives on time 
> without a single problem, the in-flight meal is wonderful. You try to tell
> customers of the other airlines about the great trip, but all they can say
> is, "You had to do what with the seat??? ... "